How I met everyone else

At the bar Ted introduces us to his newest girlfriend, whose name Future Ted can't remember and instead refers to as "Blah Blah". Embarrassed that she and Ted met online, she makes up a story about how she saw Ted across a crowded room at a cooking class. It soon becomes clear that she is extremely neurotic and paranoid when she feels threatened by Robin. In order to change the subject, we begins to reminisce about how we all met each other, and their stories are told through flashbacks.

First their stories:

How Marshall met Lily:

Marshall and Lily first met when Lily needed help with her stereo and she had a strange feeling about room Hewitt 110. Knocking on the door, Marshall answers and it is clearly love at first sight. (Although it is noted that the story has been perfected over time)

How Ted met Marshall:

Ted and Marshall first met when they became college roommates. Marshall is "eating a sandwich" (Future Ted's euphemism for smoking marijuana) when he is told that the Dean is coming. When Ted arrives, Marshall attempts to put out the sandwich and get rid of the smell thinking Ted is the Dean, getting upset when he thinks the Dean will be his roommate. The confusion is cleared up when Marshall walks in on Ted eating a sandwich of his own.
Blah Blah is still feeling threatened by Robin (especially since learning Robin is single) and starts thinking that everything she says is a personal attack against her. Desperate to take the heat off, Ted tells the story of how he met ME:

 

How Ted met ME:

Ted and I met in the men's room of McLaren's, after which I make Ted mine new wingman ( I order
 him to shave his beard and buy a suit) and tell the girl that Ted is deaf so that I can get a girl's phone number. When the girl mentions she knows sign language, Ted signs to her that I'm a great guy and recommends she give me his number.
I comment that I knew from then that I and Ted would be mine wingmen forever, even though the girl gave him a fake number. Ted tells me the true version of what happened that night:
Ted tells the girl in sign language that I'm lying and to give him a fake number, which she does.
I was upset at this, and told Blah Blah that we knows they met online. Blah Blah is angry, and Ted assures her that love at first sight rarely happens, only for Barney to remind Ted of how he met Robin:

How Ted met Robin:

Ted spotted Robin across the bar, and the two instantly felt a connection...
Blah Blah's paranoia goes into overdrive now that she knows Ted and Robin dated. She wishes she and Ted had a great first meeting story like Marshall and Lily, only for Ted to tell her that the Marshall and Lily story isn't that great. Pressed for details, Ted tells her what happened the night before:

How Ted met Lily (Ted's version):

At a freshman party at college, Ted (who is in a long-distance relationship with his girlfriend Karen) and Lily bump into each other while Marshall chugs from a keg. After some flirting, the two start making out.
Ted explains that's why Lily came to his and Marshall's room the next day, and he and Lily have never spoken of it since. Blah Blah, keen to make Ted uncomfortable, vindictively orders Ted to confess to Marshall or she will. Returning to the table, Blah Blah asks Lily how she met Ted:

How Ted met Lily (Lily's version):

Ted was on the phone to Karen, desperately apologizing for making out with another girl. Marshall brought Lily into their dorm room and introduced her to Ted, and Ted quickly rushed off upon seeing her to try sending Karen an e-mail.
When Blah Blah starts to press, Ted takes Lily aside to discuss what happened at the party. Lily claims she doesn't remember kissing Ted, although she did kiss another guy at that party who she doesn't remember. Ted tells her that he's certain it was him, and Lily is forced to accept this. Meanwhile, Marshall and I talk about how we met:

How I met Marshall:

Marshall and I met at the bar when I attempted to persuade Marshall to forget about his girlfriend and try and score with a random hot chick... even though he won't succeed. Although Marshall initially refused, he played along when I coincidentally pointed out Lily. Walking up to her, Marshall kisses her instantly making me believe Marshall has a secret seductive technique.
Blah Blah, not impressed, tells Marshall that Ted and Lily kissed. Marshall doesn't believe it, as he was at the party and knows that both Ted and Lily each made out with someone that night but knows it wasn't each other as he recalls who the other two people were. Lily accepts this, but Ted is still convinced that he made out with Lily but decides to play along as to not ruin Marshall and Lily's relationship. Blah Blah is furious and storms out, but not before revealing that she met Ted playing World of Warcraft.

Thirteen years later:

At their college reunion in 2020, Ted is approached by a woman who tells him that she was the one he made out with at the Freshman party proving Marshall was correct (revealing that Ted and Lily met when Marshall introduced them the day after the party as Lily recalled). Later Ted, Marshall and Lily all sit down for a "sandwich" that Marshall confiscated and get high when Ted suddenly realizes he can't find his wife.

P.S.
Before Blah Blah came in I explained them hot crazy scale, but they weren't believe me. 
Blah Blah make them believe me, beacuse I'm AWESOME!!! and always right.